Okay. In terms of length? This this is like Order of the Phoenix here. It's about 200 images but that's because I never update. To summarise, this all takes place over a month or two of game play. Actually, closer to two. A lot has happened with the Pottah family! We're onto our third generation but Harry and Hermione, being wizards (and Sims who I twiddle the cheats with a WHOLE LOT) don't age like we mere mortals do. Okay, so sit down, get a coffee/tea/coke/somethingstronger and enjoy (if you happen to be into this silly Sims thing). Cause I'm tellin' ya - this chapter is going to take a while.I'm starting this one with Janey. It's called foreshadowing. She's hanging out with Remus. She used to be Cassandra's friend, but then Cassandra grew up. Remus and her hang out a lot, they're good mates. He seems to like offbeat girls.Hermione is preggo yet again. I wanted to try for one more kid, this time aiming for a girl cause it'd be nice symmetry. Plus I wanted a girl that had Harry's eyes. You do NOT want to know how many reboots I had to do to get that to happen. It was a real fuckload, I tells ya.Parrot: Peace?Harry: World peace!Hermione took to toy-making as a hobby. She sells her wares in her own toy shoppe. Which she also sells fruit and random objects in that she produces in her boredom.Harry likes gardening now.So does Hermione.I like it when the family is hanging out. I think it's super sweet.An embarrassing moment when Hermione Grangah Pottah runs into Hermione Granger Potter. Oy.I'm so glad these kids got Hermione's brains.Cassandra seems to be saying, "Holy shit - you too?! What, is this pregnancy thing an airborne contagion?" AIEEE! OH THE PAIN! (I'm telling you, 'Mione, that pressing your legs together is NOT the thing to do right at that moment!)*finger in mouth pop noise*Aaaand it's a girl! (As I told you all those pictures ago anyway). I called her Phaedra. It's Greek, it's weird. I figure it's suitable.She's an utterly cute baby, I think.Harry has also taken to robotics, by the way. Random, I know. I guess being a saviour of the world gets a bit boring after a while.It's a female robot.Ended up calling her Promethea. Yes, I like Greek Mythology, shuddup! I thought it was a cute injoke.Harry cuddles Phaedra.It's all too fucking sweet.A-BPPPPPPPPPPPTTT!I think this all getting needlessly messianic!Birthday time!Levitation! She is a witch! BOOYA! Surpriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiise- BUTTSEX!Cassandra: Oh... WOW.Cassandra: You are one special lookin' kid...... And Hermione's supposed to be the SMART one!Another Parent of the Year here, folks. While he does pot in the yard, his youngest daughter makes like JAWS in the snow!Phaedra: Duh-nuh! Duh-nuh! Duh-nuh-duh-nuh-duh-nuh-duh-nuh! Doodleee-dooo!Despite her daughter being a one-person argument against Harry and Hermione ever reproducing, Hermione loves her mince-faced daughter.A lot.Jesus. Sometimes I just have to capture the horror of it all, ya know? And in case you're wondering, no, I didn't want to do plastic surgery on her cause I was honestly curious as to how an unaltered female child from these two would turn out. If she turns out anything like Sirius James and Remus, then that poor, poor little bitch.A different hair-style seems to help. She's getting her Daddy's hair.It's hard to see but she almost looks cute. Right? Right? .... Oh man.Here are some random pictures of Cassandra's squeeze, James. I think he's just delish. He seems to be a bit of a snob though. But that happens when you're raised as rich as he is.He's a gorgeous, dorky snob though. Kinda like you forgive Darcy his bullshittery because, you know, he's Colin Fucking Firth. (That's another Sim I need to make, I think).He's going to discover heavenly bodies and give them entirely forgettable names like GC-28952384Taking a moment to admire my own handiwork with the Hermione Sim. Daughter and mother hang out at the daughter's house. Cass's house is really quite lovely.More of the horror... the HORROR!No amount of photo taking will make it ANY BETTER!In other news:Sirius James is growing up rather nicely, living up to the porntasticness of his name.He has also been accepted into university! We'll follow his adventures there in a moment!Remus, on the other hand, looks more like John Lennon every day.We're wondering if this is a good thing or a bad thing.So! Uni! Let's go!He's going to wizard university, even though Jo Rowling, in a fit of feverish stupidity, decided didn't exist. Apparently, all Wizards are fucking morons. Well, not my magic men and women, peoples! Here is Gryffindor House, where Gryffindor students go. Cass was a Gryffindor and so is Sirius James.Nice banners I found. They go smashingly!He gets a call, predictably, from Remus. Remus is such a sweetheart.Fully embracing his new bohemian student lifestyle, Sirius James grows his hair long.He actually does some studying.Blue-Haired Dink: Man, I remember your sister! She's the reason I failed and am now repeating a year!Sirius James: Fuck off and tell it to someone who gives a shit.Sirius James seems to really love painting.His choices of subject are entirely my fault. You can tell, can't you?Harry Pottah seems to have a very hard time letting go. He hangs out in a hot tub with his own son. Without the Greek subext, folks.Hermione gets excited about her kids going to University because then she can get cheap opium.Sirius James: Yeah-lo? Oh, Hi Remus. Yes. Yes. Jesus-fuck, don't you shut up?Sirius James decides to experiment.Again and again.Then he decides it's party time. I have absolutely no control over whether a party will be good or not. Mainly because University has this stupid fucking thing where even people that REALLY LIKE YOU will hide from you in dorm rooms. Good going, Will Wright, you flaming fucktard! RELEASE SPORE!! YAY! SLUTS!And piano-playing llamas! That's a party!I found a funny little thing in this custom content toybox that doubles as a wardrobe, that if you get changed in it, sometimes it has an animation where the character accidentally gets naked before changing into the outfit you want it to, sans fuzzy-spot! Sirius James discovers he takes after his Daddy.In more ways than one.Before we know it, it's graduation time!Party party party!Wooohooo!Sirius James moves home.Briefly, then he moves out.This is him all grown up. He's stuck looking like this now.Seeya later, playah.Cassandra - it's crunch time!Aww, it's a boy!He shall be called Sebastian!Yes, Sebastian. You inherited half of this man's genetic information. Congratulations!Harry actually washes his child.Then puts her in her PJs and gives her a nice cuddle.Again, before we know it, it's cake time.Let's hope that the genetics are a little kinder to her this time around.Zing!Phaedra: YES! I look human!Everyone is happy that Phaedra's face no longer makes puppies whimper in abject fear.Remus: Well, time for me to be accepted into the University of Awesome.I like these leaving shots. You can tell, can't you?Phaedra: See ya! See ya!Phaedra: Miss you!Phaedra: Buh-bye!Dawww, the poor little tyke! Let's see how Remus does at uni!For some reason, the random engine pimped Remus out and cut off all his hair. I wasn't content with this.He got into Ravenclaw. He's smart, see.I decorated it.The main hang-out area.Mess hall.A cosy corner.His bedroom.I much preferred Remus in this get up.Remus does dope.Gets a bird and calls him Aristotle.He has a chin that would make that dude from Time Chasers weep.He got a haircut. Thankfully it improved things a LOT.I think Remus has decidedly gotten very hot.He momentarily takes after his father.Then the Granger genetics kick in and he's no longer a flaming idiot.I think I decorates good.Gratuitous hot Remus shot.Remus: How you doin' there, pal?Random Dorm Mate: Oh mah GOD! Books have WORDS!Remus: ... How the fuck did you get into Ravenclaw? Did someone slip the sorting hat some of our crop?Dear effing Lord above us. I know the random Sim faces get made for variety, but this guy makes gorillas look highly evolved.Remus makes friends with the resident goth girl, Ivy. They're good mates.Remus: Yo, lowbrow. Out of my room.Hermione: So I was thinking it's your turn to add to the family. Man or woman, I don't care which. I'm not prejudiced.Remus: ... Mum, I'm not gay.Hermione: Are you sure? I mean totally? You are rather fond of James Forsythe. Remember the blood nose you got when you first met him?Remus: I ran into the wall!Hermione: Exactly.Turns out that Remus discovers exactly how gay he isn't...Remus: Gee, I haven't seen Janey in a while. I invited her around for a coffee.Remus: B-juh... A-wuh... *drool*Gorgeously and without my tampering at ALL (no, seriously), the feeling is mutual! And yeah, I had to age Janey up with a hack. Cause I'll be fucked if I'm playing her entire life just to set her up with a Sim I'm attached to.Remus: Woohoo! Here's for wanting to do our best friends!Remus: Except not that one. She's a little odd in a way that's not a flag-raiser for me.Ivy: Woohoo! Go Remo!I decorated the bar again.Time passes, Remus does the studying/learning thing.And the day comes after he's been going out with Janey for a while.The answer was yes. They're getting a puppy. I mean, they're getting engaged.Time for the plonk!Remus: To us!Remus: Let's get shitfaced and do it like monkeys!Janey: Awriiight!Before Remus knows it, it's graduation time.He and his Mum end up partying on the porch. Sadly, I couldn't induce the cops to turn up and make them turn the music down. :(They put on a great show, though.He gets cheered on as he graduates. By the catering lady and the barmaid of all people. *shrugs* Yes, I really do like those taxi shots.Meanwhile:Harry visits Sirius James at his new abode.Later that evening, Sirius James gets jiggy with Melissa Fancey, one of the NPC Simtards.She must have a really nice personality or something.*tired sigh* When you next see her, she's going to look entirely different. Like, you know, an actual woman.Remus moves into the main Pottah household for a while.He catches up properly with his Dad.Remus: I has learnings.Harry: Oh yeah? Well I'm a world-famous wizard.Remus: Yeah, but most wizards are ignorant fucks.Harry: Okay, that's it! You better get your dukes up!Remus also spends some time with his now-fat sister Phaedra.Remus: Sorry it's been such a long time, kid.Awwww. Phaedra missed her big bro.Hermione has taken to fishing.That's a lot of fish to come out of a pond that probably only holds ten gallons of water.Now that Remus and Janey have finished university, they can get married! (Well, okay, Janey technically never went to University, but in my head she did so ner.)I put on such a good damned ceremony.I think Janey is happy she's going to be related to Phaedra now.Vows are exchanged, as are looks of unveiled lust. ... Heh, not really. The vows yes, the lust, no. Not that I saw, anyway. *golf claps*Crunky time!So they all toast to Remus. Fuck Janey, she's just the baby-maker!Fah-fah-fah! Rhubarb, rhubarb!Spaaaaych! Spaaaaaych!Janey: Eat it, bitch!Janey: HAhahahahaa!Remus: That's not the only white sticky stuff that'll be on our faces tonight!Janey: Hahah-- Dude!Slow dance time. I'm currently having a bit of low blood sugar (I am hungry as HELL) so I'm not going to be too funny here.Time to get their smustle on!Even Janey's totally hot mother is in on the action.I think you get the idea. Though for some reason, weddings are the only parties I can get to the 'roof raiser' level. Sports parties are death to my Sims, I can never make them work.Time for Nacey's patented "Boring Car Shot".It is time for hot sex.It was soon after the honeymoon that Remus moved out with Janey into his own home. Not that Harry's house wasn't big enough for them, but holy shit they were slowing down my game for some reason.Promethea is enjoying the break from the non-stop chores that were around when the house was full.Of course, with only Phaedra and Promethea in the house, and Promethea being in recharge mode and Phaedra having a nap, you know what it's time for...Awww yeah.They love being magic folk, man. They can enjoy sex with the virility and stamina of twenty-something year olds, with the experience and know-how of fifty-somethings.Harry Pottah decided that he wanted a career change. So he decided he wanted to become a musician. Here he is, coming down from his first day of work, already promoted. He also brings a friend home from work. Jack Harkness. I don't think he realises what he's getting himself into.Hermione is very happy for him.Happy, horny - same diff.Jack: Duh-huh-huh - WHEEEEE! I can swing HIGH!It's time to get Phaedra into private school. They invite the principal over.They're off to an interesting start. The redhead goth character invited herself to the dinner party.Then the robot and the omnisexual come to stuff their faces as well.It's enough to drive a world-saving Wizard prodigy to drink.Hermione: So, does Phaedra stand a sporting chance to get into your school?Principal Dick: Oh HAYLL no! ...Hermione: Jigga-WHUT?!Hermione was glad to discover that that particular principal died in a terrible, tragic house fire at the Pleasant's household. My brother really had nothing to do with it at all.Phaedra: So that pretty man isn't your friend, he's your special twinkle of joy?Jack Harkness: That's right, sweetheart.Phaedra: You make SMOOCHIES like Mummy and Daddy?!Jack Harkness: Totally!Phaedra: When I grow up, can I WATCH?!Jack Harkness: ...Jack Harkness, before leaving, has a quick chat with Harry PottahJack Harkness: So, okay, let me get this straight. You're *not* gay? Not even a little bit?Harry: I don't think so. I mean, I'm a wizard. We act flambouyant and flamey as a matter of course.Jack Harkness: Aaah, that's why you keep wearing all that satin.Harry: Precisely. Jack Harkness: *sigh*Harry: I like gay people though. One of my biggest dead fans was gay.Jack Harkness: ...The stupid teen spawn of Pleasants decides to set herself on fire by staying too long in the spa, then walking off COMPLETELY UNAFFECTED BY THE FUCKING FIRE, only to have HARRY FUCKING POTTAH set on fire! She nearly achieved in mere moments what it took Voldemort SEVEN BOOKS to come close to! Thankfully Hermione and Promethea came running in with some serious white-foamy sprayage.Phaedra: Jesus, Dad, your life is interesting.Harry: *sigh* I know.Harry decides to get a guinea pig. Womrat. Whatever.Noogie-noogie-noogie!Promethea has an odd moment of wanting to be human so that she could SO BANG THAT SHIT.Phaedra: LOOK! LOOK! I DON'T SUCK!Promethea: Oh gooood, you took after your mother!Poor Harry and Hermione were at work and so missed this golden moment. Hermione wants to suddenly be an adventurer by the way. *shrugs* You gotta do something with your free time, I suppose.Meanwhile, the pirate takes advantage of Promethea's weakness and has his friendly way with the parrot.Jack Sparrow: Okay, mate, it's our secret!Phaedra is ridiculously excited about Hermione arriving home from work. She runs up to her and gives her a big fat hug. I didn't tell her to do this - she did it all herself. That autonomous free will stuff is the SHIT cause this was so cute, my face melted off my head.Phaedra: I totally rock at this school thing!Right at that moment, a mere metre behind them, there is a Pirate Traffic Jam. HOTTEST JAM EVAR.Hermione: Being smart is great, cause you win every argument and have a smug sense of superiority!Phaedra: Fuckin' A!Phaedra is also happy to see her Daddy. Because Daddy is now judging music competitions, he dresses like Vyvyan from the Young Ones.Into the home stretch, folks!This is Remus and Janey's house: Grindylow Grove.This is in their yard. This is where the Grindylows live.This is always embarrassing. See, I created yet another woman to steal her face for Janey, cause it was way too creepy having Remus getting with a woman who was, as a child, the face-graft of his big sister. So essentially, she has the same 'genetics' as his sister. Wrong, wrong, wrong! I had to fix it before I let them get married (and I did) and so now, Janey has a double running around. This double is sensibly married and totally unavailable to any possible sprog that these two will have.I'll be ending this one like the other one. A bunch of friends playing poker. ;)PHEW! That was a fucking chore and a half. I'll try to keep the following ones MUCH SHORTER, my darlings!
ok these are absolutely hilarious! I keep trying to explain to my parents why I am laughing for no reason.. I think this is way over their heads. I can't wait for the next installment.
It shouldn't be too long. I play the Sims far too much. LOL!
LOL - I'm all caught up on your saga and I think I really need to buy the Sims game. I had the original one years ago and when one of my two most beloved characters died in a horrible cooking fire, I gave it up. I must get back into it!! Thanks for all the updates!
No problem! I popped out Ares' child by the way - a girl! She has his eyes! I took plenty of photos and I'll be updating soon! :DOh, and the funny thing? Ares is a way better parent than I am! He was like, "Baby! Let's feed it and play with it and carry it!" And I'm like "Meh. I'm going to go read a book now."Mother of the YEAR!